快捷操作: 按键盘上方向键 ← 或 → 可快速上下翻页 按键盘上的 Enter 键可回到本书目录页 按键盘上方向键 ↑ 可回到本页顶部! 如果本书没有阅读完，想下次继续接着阅读，可使用上方 "收藏到我的浏览器" 功能 和 "加入书签" 功能！

about　it。　？I？m　just　glad　it？s　over；？　he　mumbled。　Lord　Marcus　looked　bigger　than　he　remembered；　
and　even　though　he　was　a　guy；　Nate　could　appreciate　how　handsome　he　was。　Blair　had　really　
scored。　

？That？s　how　I　feel；？　Blair　agreed　with　a　perky　smile。　She　reached　up　and　casually　stroked　the　
back　of　Lord　Marcus？s　tanned；　muscular　neck；　showing　off　how　fortable　she　was　talking　to　
Nate　while　sitting　on　Marcus？s　lap。　

Nate　suddenly　perked　up；　remembering　the　reason　he？d　e　to　the　party　in　the　first　
place。　？Blair；　can　I　talk　to　you　for　a　minute？？　he　asked；　although　to　him　it　sounded　like　he？d　
said；　？Woo　shee　ga　ga？？　

Blair　had　always　been　the　needy　one　in　their　on…again…off…again　relationship；　so　it　was　a　new　
experience　to　see　Nate　hovering　over　her；　looking　unfortable　and　a　little　desperate；　with　
something　bulky　stuffed　under　his　arm。　Was　he　going　to　give　her　a　present？　she　wondered。　God　
knew　she？d　given　him　enough　presents　in　their　time　together；　and　he？d　hardly　given　her　anything　
except　flowers　a　few　times；　when　he？d　thought　of　it。　


？Don？t　go　anywhere。　We？ll　be　right　back；？　she　murmured　to　Marcus。　She　slipped　off　his　knee；　
flashing　him　a　sultry　
I？m…only…tolerating…this…party…for…a…half…hour…more…before…I…tear…your…clothes…off　look。　Then　she　
followed　Nate　into　a　semiquiet　corner　of　the　crowded　room；　trying　to　appear　impatient　and　
indifferent　while　her　heart　thundered　so　furiously　in　her　chest；　she　wouldn？t　have　been　surprised　if　
it　were　visible　through　her　nearly　transparent　cream…colored　camisole。　

Nate　pulled　the　thing　out　from　under　his　arm？a　navy　blue　paper　Gap　shopping　bag；　folded　in　half。　
Blair　was　slightly　appalled。　He？d　bought　her　a　gift　at　the　Gap？　

？Here；？　he　murmured；　yanking　something　out　of　the　bag　and　handing　it　to　her。　Blair　recognized　it　
at　once：　the　moss　green　cashmere　V…neck　sweater　she？d　given　him　over　a　year　ago。　

？But　you　love　this　sweater；？　she　plained；　feeling　for　the　gold　heart　she？d　sewn　into　the　left　
sleeve　before　she　gave　it　to　him　so　he　would　always　be　wearing　her　heart　on　his　sleeve。　It　wasn？t　
there。　Blair　felt　inside　the　right　sleeve；　although　she　was　absolutely　positive　she？d　sewn　it　into　the　
left。　Nope。　Where　the　fuck　was　it？　

？I　just　don？t　think　it？d　be　right　to　keep　it；？　Nate　replied　solemnly。　He　blinked　hard；　willing　the　
tears　not　to　fall。　He　wondered　if　Blair　even　remembered　the　gold　heart；　which　was　now　sitting　in　a　
sailboat…shaped　blue…and…green　sea　glass　ashtray　beside　his　bed；　a　constant　reminder　of　their　failed　
relationship。　

Hey；　maybe　he　should　talk　to　Les　Best　about　a　new　men？s　cologne？Nate？s　Tears！　

？It？s　just　a　sweater；？　Blair　insisted；　feeling　pletely　confused。　Why　couldn？t　Nate　just　be　
normal　and　give　her　a　boring　Tiffany　chain…link　bracelet　or　something　to　congratulate　her　on　
graduating？　Was　this　his　way　of　saying　sorry；　or　that　he　wanted　her　back？　Well；　it　was　a　little　late　
for　that。　？Please；　keep　it。？　

？I　can？t；？　Nate　gasped；　choking　up。　He　wished　he　could　confide　in　Blair；　tell　her　all　about　how　
he？d　screwed　up　graduating；　how　he？d　screwed　up　in　general。　But　Nate　had　never　truly　confided　
in　Blair；　and　now　probably　wasn？t　the　best　time　to　start。　

？Fine。？　She　folded　the　sweater　neatly　and　placed　it　on　a　Yale…blue…upholstered　armchair　nearby。　
She　put　her　hands　on　her　hips；　determined　not　to　allow　herself　to　waver。　She　had　a　new　boyfriend　
now。　A　much；　much　better　one。　？Was　that　all？？　

Nate　nodded。　Then　he　took　a　step　forward；　closed　his　emerald　green　eyes；　and　placed　a　careful　
kiss　on　Blair？s　smooth；　soft　cheek。　He　opened　his　eyes。　？Congratulations；？　he　murmured　before　
turning　away。　

Blair　stood　there　for　a　moment　with　her　arms　folded　across　her　chest；　ignoring　the　stares　of　her　
whispering　classmates。It？s　just　a　sweater　；　she　repeated　silently　to　herself。　


　Yeah。　Right。　

Remind　me　how　much　i　love　you　

Dan　kept　his　hunter　green　Riverside　Prep　school　tie　on　for　Blair？s　party。　He　wanted　to　look　his　
handsomest　when　he　announced　to　Vanessa　that　he？d　deferred　admission　to　Evergreen　and　wanted　
to　spend　next　year　and　possibly　the　rest　of　his　life　with　her。　As　soon　as　they　arrived　at　the　party；　
Jenny　went　right　to　the　bar　to　score　a　glass　of　champagne；　but　Dan　lingered　by　the　door；　his　arms　
full　of　red　roses；　transfixed　by　the　sight　of　Vanessa　looking　resplendent　in　her　sexy　low…cut　white　
graduation　dress　and　funky　white　wedge…heeled　shoes。　There　was　a　pink　flush　to　her　cheeks　and　a　
sparkle　to　her　dark　brown　eyes　as　she　chatted　with　Serena　van　der　Woodsen。　Serena　was　gorgeous　
as　usual；　with　her　mane　of　pale　blond　hair　cascading　between　her　bare　shoulder　blades　and　her　
endless　legs；　but　the　sight　of　her　didn？t　turn　Dan　on　the　way　the　sight　of　Vanessa　did。　

？Hey；　hot　stuff；　get　your　ass　over　here！？　Vanessa　shouted　at　him　from　across　the　room。　She？d　
been　drunk　since　one　o？clock　in　the　afternoon　and　the　sight　of　Dan；　his　arms　full　of　roses；　was　less　
a　turn…on　than　a　revelation。　A　drunken　one。　

This　morning　she？d　almost　driven　off　with　the　wrong　boy。　It　was　Dan　she　loved。　How　could　she　
not？with　his　scruffy　looks；　his　painfully　wrought　poems；　and　the　way　he　kept　showing　up　
unexpectedly　on　her　roof　with　his　clothes　off。　

As　Dan　approached；　she　sort　of　oofed　herself　out　of　the　Yale…blue…and…white　striped　wing…back　
chair　she　was　sitting　in　but　then　gave　up　and　fell　back　into　it　again。　？I？m　trying　to　hug　you；？　she　
explained；　laughing　at　herself。　

She？s　drunk；　he　realized。　

Serena　grabbed　him　and　kissed　him　on　the　cheek；　then　pushed　him　into　Vanessa？s　lap。　？You？re　
always　so　cute；？　she　cooed；　ruffling　Dan？s　scraggly　light　brown　hair　as　red　roses　fell　out　of　his　
arms　and　scattered　around　their　feet。　

Vanessa　tickled　him　under　the　arms　and　he　shrugged　her　needling　fingers　away；　suddenly　feeling　
more　like　someone？s　cute　four…year…old　brother　than　Vanessa？s　stud…muffin　boyfriend。　

？So；　the　big　news　is　Serena？s　going　to　be　a　movie　star；　and　I？m　going　to　help　make　her　cheesy　
big…budget　movie；　because　if　we　sell　out；　we？ll　make　selling　out　look　cool；？　Vanessa　told　him　with　
drunken　excitement。　

Serena　and　Vanessa　slapped　each　other　five　like　old　soccer　teammates。　Then　Serena　refilled　her　


glass　of　Dom　out　of　the　magnum　on　the　floor　next　to　Vanessa？s　chair　and　handed　the　overflowing　
flute　to　Dan。　？To　Hollywood；？　she　cried　gleefully；　waiting　for　Dan　to　chug　it　down。　

Dan　perched　on　Vanessa？s　pale　bare　knee；　trying　not　to　spill　his　champagne。　He？d　prepared　a　
Pablo　Neruda　love　poem　to　recite；　but　maybe　now　wasn？t　such　a　great　time。　

？Do　you　think　I　should　tell　them　to　turn　the　music　up　so　we　can　dance？？　Serena　burped　loudly。　

？Definitely。？　Vanessa　bounced　up　and　down　on　the　chair　cushion；　causing　Dan　to　tumble　onto　the　
floor。　？Dan　will　dance　with　us；　won？t　you；　Dan？？　

Dan　clambered　to　his　feet；　eager　for　Serena　to　leave　him　alone　with　Vanessa。　？Sure。？　

Serena　whirled　away；　a　vision　of　yellow　silk　and　golden　hair。　The　room　was　packed　with　people　
and　the　air　was　thick　with　cigarette　smoke　and　perfume。　Everyone　had　been　celebrating　since　
morning；　so　it　felt　like　fourA。M。　instead　of　tenP。M。　For　old　times？　sake；　a　group　of　girls　from　
Seaton　Arms　and　Constance　were　playing　Spin　the　Bottle　with　a　group　of　boys　from　Riverside。　

？Me　first！？　Chuck　Bass　crowed；　kneeling　down　to　give　the　empty　Stoli　bottle　an　energetic　spin。　

　Typical。　

？Dad　got　pretty　mad　at　me　today；？　Dan　confessed。　He　perched　on　the　arm　of　Vanessa？s　chair；　
suddenly　so　nervous；　he　couldn？t　drink　his　champagne。　She　wasn？t　looking　at　him；　but　he　hoped　
she　was　listening。　？I　guess　I　should？ve　told　him　before　I　made　my　speech。？　

Vanessa　was　watching　Serena　as　she　flirted　with　Jarvis　Cocker？the　crazy　cool　British　DJ　wearing　
a　black　top　hat　at　his　station　across　the　room。　She　had　to　admire　how　pletely　shameless　Serena　
was。　She？d　do　anything　as　long　as　it　wasn？t　too　illegal　or　humiliating；　just　because　it　amused　her。　
The　thing　Vanessa　most　admired；　though；　was　that　Serena　wasn？t　conceited？she　was　justSerena　。　
And　she　didn？t　seem　to　need　anyone　else　to　be　Serena。　She　was　just　fine　being　herself。　

？See；　I　kind　of　changed　my　mind　about　going　to　Evergreen；？　Dan　continued。　？At　least；　not　right　
away。？　

Vanessa　could　feel　Dan　staring　at　her　and　she　realized　he　was　trying　to　tell　her　something　
important　and　that　she？d　missed　half　of　it。　？Wait。　What？？　

Dan　slid　off　the　arm　of　the　chair　and　knelt　down　on　the　burnished　amber　wood　floor；　grasping　her　
hands　in　his。？I　do　not　love　you　except　because　I　love　you；？　he　recited。　

Vanessa　was　glad　the　room　was　so　crowded；　otherwise　she　might　have　been　a　little　embarrassed。　

？I　can？t　imagine　not　sharing　the　air　you　breathe；　living　all　those　miles　away；？　Dan　told　her　


earnestly；　in　his　own　words　this　time。　？Like　I　said　in　my　speech；　I　can　go　to　college　any　time；　but　
I？m　in　love　with　you　now。　And　the　only　thing　I　want；　my　only　requirement；　is　to　be　with　you。？　

Vanessa？s　face　turned　hot　and　prickly。　Yes；　she　loved　him；　but　did　he　have　to　be　so　darned　
dramatic？　？So　you？re　？？　Her　voice　trailed　off　uncertainly。　

？Staying　here；？　Dan　filled　in；　gazing　up　at　her　with　adoring　brown　eyes。　？With　you。？　

All　of　a　sudden　that　new　OutKast　song　that　no　one　could　listen　to　without　jumping　to　their　feet　
and　wiggling　their　ass　came　blasting　out　of　the　speakers　ten　decibels　louder　than　the　smooth　R&B　
that　had　been　playing　before。　Serena　bounded　over；　grabbed　Vanessa？s　hand；　and　pulled　her　out　of　
the　chair。　？e　on；　groovy　girl；？　she　coaxed。　？Show　me　what　you　got。？　

Vanessa　had　always　loathed　dancing；　at　least　in　public；　but　she　needed　to　get　away　from　Dan　
right　now；　and　all　his　intensity。　Serena　bumped　hips　with　her　and　Vanessa　laughed　and　bumped　her　
back。　She　could　feel　Dan　watching　them　intently；　but　she　didn？t　turn　around。　The　music　was　good；　
and　she　felt　vibrant　and　beautiful　in　her　slippery；　shimmering　white　Morgane　Le　Fay　dress。　Dan　
must　have　been　crazy　to　think　not　going　to　college　next　year　was　a　good　idea。　Of　course　he　was　
going；　but　they　could　spend　the　summer　together　working　it　out。　The　music　grew　louder　still；　and　
Vanessa　raised　her　bare　arms　in　the　air；　grooving　to　it。　Dan　was　pletely　nuts；　but　so　was　she　
for　ever　having　said　she　didn？t　dance。　

N？s　trail　of　tears　

Nate　sat　on　the　edge　of　one　of　the　Yale　Club　lounge？s　oriental　carpets；　pretending　to　watch　the　
Spin　the　Bottle　game。　That　French　hippie　chick；　Lexie；　who？d　followed　him　around　for　a　few　
weeks　claiming　to　be　madly　in　love　with　him；　and　her　other　L？？cole　friends　were　sitting　in　a　tight　
circle　only　a　few　feet　away；　all　wearing　crocheted　halter　tops　with　their　skinny　bellies　showing；　
smoking　Gauloises　like　fiends。　He　hoped　she　wouldn？t　notice　him。

　Too　late。　

？Nate？？　Lexie　sat　up　on　her　haunches；　her　scrawny；　tan　tummy　bulging　in　a　way　she　must　have　
thought　was　irresistible。　She？d　gotten　a　navel　piercing；　and　it　was　still　pink　and　new。

　Ew。　

She　stretched　her　long　bare　arms　overhead；　giving　the　rest　of　the　room　a　fine　view　of　the　sun；　
moon；　and　stars　tattoo　on　her　right　shoulder　blade。　

Ooh　la　la。　


Nate　smiled；　pretending　to　have　only　just　noticed　her。　？Hey；　Lexie。？　He　waved　cautiously　and　
then　hugged　his　knees　to　show　that　he　had　no　intention　of　joining　her。　

Lexie　rolled　her　dark　brown　eyes　and　flipped　her　long　raven…colored　ponytail　over　one　
shoulder。　？Bastard；？　she　retorted　with　a　heavy　French　accent　and　a　very　French…looking　
scowl。　？You　broke　my　heart。？　

Something　exciting　had　just　happened　in　the　Spin　the　Bottle　game；　and　everyone　whooped　and　
clapped。　Nate　began　to　clap；　too？anything　to　avoid　a　confrontation　with　Lexie。　

Serena　and　that　weird　shaven…headed　girl　from　Constance　who　Blair　was　supposedly　living　with　
and　reportedly　having　a　lesbian　affair　with　were　dancing　like　disco　diva　freaks　in　the　middle　of　the　
room；　looking　drunk　and　ecstatic？the　way　you　were　supposed　to　look　the　day　you　graduated　from　
high　school。　

If；　that　is；　you　actually　obtained　your　diploma　that　day；　unlike　a　certain　person　we　know。　

Nate　had　a　sudden　flash　of　d？j？　vu；　or　maybe　it　was　ennui。　At　any　rate；　it　was　something　sad　that　
sounded　French。　He　remembered　being　drunk